“Sow a thought, and you reap an act; Sow an act, and you reap a habit; Sow a habit, and you reap a character; Sow a character, and you reap a destiny”

Charles Reade

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Day 3 of my new life

When I graduated from high school I had the honor and privilege of speaking at my high school graduation. I was not even in the top 100 of my very large graduating class. I’m sure many of my classmates didn’t understand how that happened, especially the valedictorian, who was my friend.
Years before I graduated, I had a premonition of sorts, and I knew that I was going to be asked to speak at my graduation one day. I remember the day that it happened. I was sitting in my homeroom and the speaker came on for an announcement. The impression came to my mind that this was it. My name was going to be called and I was going to be asked. The announcer asked that the following people report to the senior sponsors room, my name was called with several others. I’m sure most of the students assumed that I was going to be asked to sing. I had been in all the school musicals and had sung with my sisters in the community, so that was the logical assumption. What most people didn’t know was that I had taken a speech class at the beginning of the year and I, and one of the other girls in the class, got a 100 in that class. It was never mentioned, but I was sure that had something to do with both of us speaking.

I was always impressed with Roger, the valedictorian, he was an impressive young man. He could have been bitter about not speaking at graduation, if he was I never knew it. He ended up playing his flute as part of the accompaniment for another class member that sang. He could have acted ugly or been too offended to participate at all. Roger had choice, he made a good one.

We all have a choice. No matter what happens, we choose how we will respond to what goes on around us. I don’t always act on my negative thoughts. When I have responded well to a bad situation I have that “fruits of the spirit” experience every time. I wonder why I still behave badly sometimes knowing what the bad consequences are and having felt those wonderful fruits. If we are honest with ourselves that habit is one because we like being the martyr.

Well my graduation speech wasn’t my best speech. I’m fairly sure no one who was there remembers what I said. I remember. I think about it often, especially today. I spoke about a truth that I had learned from the President of our church at the time, Spencer W. Kimball. I did not use this quote from his talk but this was the message I wanted to share:

“We hope we can help our young men and young women to realize, even sooner than they do now, that they need to make certain decisions only once. I have mentioned at this pulpit before some determinations made early in my life, which decisions were such a help to me because I did not have to remake those decisions perpetually. We can push some things away from us once and have done with them! We can make a single decision about certain things that we will incorporate in our lives and then make them ours—without having to brood and redecide a hundred times what it is we will do and what we will not do.”

I needed those words then and I tried to do what he suggested, I decided I would never smoke or drink, I never have, I didn’t have to wait for the temptation to come to know how I would respond if offered drugs.

So here I am finally deciding that when the negative thoughts come, I am no longer going to stew in them and entertain them. I have decided to tell myself I can handle whatever comes. As Joseph B. Worthlin says “come what may and love it”

I have had a great third day. Many opportunities to fall back have presented themselves but I pushed the negative thoughts out with reminders to myself that I am a grown, mature woman now, my circumstances will not dictate my behavior, I want to feel happy, powerful and in control not angry, whiny and unhappy. I also know that ideas for how to handle a situation come to a calm, serene mind, not a frantic, frenzied one. Remembering that helps too.

I have decided to decide that when life gives me lemons, I'm going to make lemonaide!

Here are two quotes to ponder for today from Joseph B. Worthlin:

“ Have you ever seen an angry driver who, when someone else makes a mistake, reacts as though that person has insulted his honor, his family, his dog, and his ancestors all the way back to Adam? Or have you had an encounter with an overhanging cupboard door left open at the wrong place and the wrong time which has been cursed, condemned, and avenged by a sore-headed victim?
There is an antidote for times such as these: learn to laugh.”

“The way we react to adversity can be a major factor in how happy and successful we can be in life.”

And by the way Roger Riggle, my valedictorian friend, is a professional make-up artist, choreographer, director and producer. Google his name, he’s amazing!

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