tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-40408103530649313972024-03-14T07:02:20.123-07:00Mom Pence, my new lifea daily record of my life... moving from negative to positiveElaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.comBlogger103125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4040810353064931397.post-65988850674539094832012-03-10T20:16:00.000-08:002012-03-10T20:19:27.987-08:00What about feeling agitated?I took my son to the doctor today to get a physical, at 9:45. We got there 15 minutes early and waited more than 40 minutes to be seen. There was only one person waiting in the office when I got there and they let someone else go ahead of us. I felt myself getting a little agitated and wanted to say something, but I didn't want to give in to those negative feelings. When they finally called for us they asked if we had brought the forms from the school to fill out and I said I wish they had asked me that when I got there I had already waited more than 40 minutes, and I didn't have the forms. The receptionist looked at her calender and said the appointment was for 10:30. She found some extra forms and the physical was completed.<br />
Decided to decide: next time I start to feel agitated calmly find out information, like in this situation I could have asked- What time was my appointment? and don't wait so long.Elaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4040810353064931397.post-70360607274974375622012-02-24T16:52:00.000-08:002012-02-24T16:52:42.491-08:00"I'm Singing in the rain", Gene Kelly<iframe height="344" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/rmCpOKtN8ME?fs=1" frameborder="0" width="459" allowfullscreen=""></iframe>Elaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4040810353064931397.post-84571708627300419092012-02-23T17:07:00.002-08:002012-02-23T17:11:45.166-08:00Exploring OptionsSo I have been busy exploring options. I haven't written about the great talks I've been having with myself as I try new things and enjoy experimenting with ideas. <br />
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We own a commercial building in my little town of Buena Vista, Va. where we used to run an ice cream parlor. Ever since we closed it down we have been trying to sell it or rent it out. While I'm waiting I have been trying to find ways to use it. I tried an after school program for middleschoolers, tea parties for gray haired ladies, and now I am just offering it to rent for parties and events. Instead of getting discouraged I decided to do something else and not try so hard to do something with it. <br />
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Phil and I have often talked about writing and/or making movies. Members of our family have performed in commercials and movies on a small scale in the past. Our current business is dealing with foreclosed homes and we are currently busy, but if thing begin to go well in the economy, we may need something to fall back on, and we don't want Phil to do anymore carpentry work, so we decided now is the time to prepare for something new and something we have always wanted to do. So, he sold his pick up truck and we paid some taxes and used the rest for a professional video camera. <br />
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As usual some of our children think we are crazy and are negative about our ideas. I remind myself that I should surround myself with positive people and not listen to the negative people. <br />
I am learning to not listen to them and let them drive me away from what I have decided to do.<br />
My husband always tells them that anyone can do anything that they put their mind to and work hard enough for. We have a couple of projects in the works and some ideas for future projects. We are learning some good stuff and having a lot of fun and keeping in mind that "up from the ashes grow the roses of success" or "If at first you don't succeed, try, try again."<br />
Keep watching, I'll post how you can view our first project when it is ready.Elaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4040810353064931397.post-79589370501411597462012-01-26T06:21:00.000-08:002012-01-26T06:21:15.963-08:00Financial setbacksFinancial setbacks, I can handle it, been there done that. Your not getting me down!<br />
It will take time and patience, in the meantime I will distract myself with a video camera and a digital SLR. Watch for uploads!Elaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4040810353064931397.post-76948573757674378672011-11-22T19:20:00.000-08:002011-11-22T19:22:03.725-08:00Gratitude is a positive way to thinkI am thankful for so many things. I find that when I am feeling sorry for myself, if I stop and truely count my blessings, I have so little to complain about. <br />
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Feeling sorry for yourself and complaining are just plain bad habits!!! <br />
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HAPPY THANKSGIVING!<br />
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Let us all give thanks.Elaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4040810353064931397.post-54728694277229624222011-09-19T05:58:00.000-07:002011-09-19T05:58:28.917-07:00Fun To DoWoke up this morning thinking about my recent success in controlling my selfish thoughts and a little ditty from the LDS Children'sSongbook, by Rebecca Stevens And Cecelia Johns, came to mind. (with my own words)<br />
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Changing my thoughts is Fun to Do, Fun to Do, Fun to Do<br />
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Changing my thoughts is Fun to Do, to Do, to Do, to Do.Elaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4040810353064931397.post-54369875586330458882011-09-12T19:26:00.000-07:002011-09-12T19:26:47.859-07:00Whats working? Starting each day with a prayer and a song and reminding myself of who I want to be for my family.Elaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4040810353064931397.post-80432957841188142632011-09-09T16:43:00.000-07:002011-09-09T16:45:47.414-07:00ACCENTUATE THE POSITIVE ~ Johnny Mercer & The Pied Pipers .wmv<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="344" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/f3jdbFOidds?fs=1" width="425"></iframe>Elaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4040810353064931397.post-9343727089777971962011-09-03T18:20:00.000-07:002011-09-03T18:20:01.153-07:00YagottawannaEarly morning prayers and positive self talk a must for taking control of thoughts that turn to bad behavior. I have had a real desire to stay in control, and Yagottawanna or you wont. You know if you really want to change or not. If you really want to you will. Elaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4040810353064931397.post-28610229502978138222011-08-10T19:36:00.000-07:002011-08-10T19:36:33.402-07:00Sometimes its just plain hard to let go of the bad feelings and negative thoughts. I let myself wallow in them real good for a few days, then I remembered what I had decided to do. I had to create and act on a positve thought. I called my husband and mustered a cheerful tone and told him all I needed was some chocolate. Immediately I began to feel better and catch on more positve thoughts and actions. It really does work. <br />
Sometimes its the simple act of smiling at someone even if you don't feel like smiling. I've been thinking about a quote I once saw, I don't know who to credit for it.<br />
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" If you can't lift the corners up, let the middle sag!"<br />
Elaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4040810353064931397.post-19105691778313557322011-07-31T21:07:00.000-07:002011-07-31T21:07:12.661-07:00Positive self talk Part 2Identifying negative thinking<br />
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<br />
Not sure if your self-talk is positive or negative? Here are some common forms of negative self-talk: <br />
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Filtering. You magnify the negative aspects of a situation and filter out all of the positive ones. For example, say you had a great day at work. You completed your tasks ahead of time and were complimented for doing a speedy and thorough job. But you forgot one minor step. That evening, you focus only on your oversight and forget about the compliments you received. <br />
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Personalizing. When something bad occurs, you automatically blame yourself. For example, you hear that an evening out with friends is canceled, and you assume that the change in plans is because no one wanted to be around you. <br />
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Catastrophizing. You automatically anticipate the worst. The drive-through coffee shop gets your order wrong and you automatically think that the rest of your day will be a disaster. <br />
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Polarizing. You see things only as either good or bad, black or white. There is no middle ground. You feel that you have to be perfect or that you're a total failure.<br />
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Focusing on positive thinking<br />
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You can learn to turn negative thinking into positive thinking. The process is simple, but it does take time and practice — you're creating a new habit, after all. Here are some ways to think and behave in a more positive and optimistic way: <br />
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Identify areas to change. If you want to become more optimistic and engage in more positive thinking, first identify areas of your life that you typically think negatively about, whether it's work, your daily commute or a relationship, for example. You can start small by focusing on one area to approach in a more positive way. <br />
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Check yourself. Periodically during the day, stop and evaluate what you're thinking. If you find that your thoughts are mainly negative, try to find a way to put a positive spin on them. <br />
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Be open to humor. Give yourself permission to smile or laugh, especially during difficult times. Seek humor in everyday happenings. When you can laugh at life, you feel less stressed. <br />
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Follow a healthy lifestyle. Exercise at least three times a week to positively affect mood and reduce stress. Follow a healthy diet to fuel your mind and body. And learn to manage stress. <br />
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Surround yourself with positive people. Make sure those in your life are positive, supportive people you can depend on to give helpful advice and feedback. Negative people may increase your stress level and make you doubt your ability to manage stress in healthy ways. <br />
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Practice positive self-talk. Start by following one simple rule: Don't say anything to yourself that you wouldn't say to anyone else. Be gentle and encouraging with yourself. If a negative thought enters your mind, evaluate it rationally and respond with affirmations of what is good about you.<br />
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Here are some examples of negative self-talk and how you can apply a positive thinking twist to them. <br />
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Negative self-talk Positive thinking<br />
I've never done it before. It's an opportunity to learn something new.<br />
It's too complicated. I'll tackle it from a different angle.<br />
I don't have the resources. Necessity is the mother of invention.<br />
I'm too lazy to get this done. I wasn't able to fit it into my schedule but can re-examine some priorities.<br />
There's no way it will work. I can try to make it work.<br />
It's too radical a change. Let's take a chance.<br />
No one bothers to communicate with me. I'll see if I can open the channels of communication.<br />
I'm not going to get any better at this. I'll give it another try.<br />
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Practicing positive thinking every day<br />
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If you tend to have a negative outlook, don't expect to become an optimist overnight. But with practice, eventually your self-talk will contain less self-criticism and more self-acceptance. You may also become less critical of the world around you. Plus, when you share your positive mood and positive experience, both you and those around you enjoy an emotional boost. <br />
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Practicing positive self-talk will improve your outlook. When your state of mind is generally optimistic, you're able to handle everyday stress in a more constructive way. That ability may contribute to the widely observed health benefits of positive thinking.Elaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4040810353064931397.post-31556531305819813652011-07-27T18:28:00.001-07:002011-07-27T18:28:55.679-07:00Part 1 (I found this article on the internet)Positive thinking: Reduce stress by eliminating negative self-talk<br />
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<br />
Positive thinking helps with stress management and can even improve your health. Practice overcoming negative self-talk with examples provided. <br />
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By Mayo Clinic staff <br />
<br />
Is your glass half-empty or half-full? How you answer this age-old question about positive thinking may reflect your outlook on life, your attitude toward yourself, and whether you're optimistic or pessimistic — and it may even affect your health. <br />
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Indeed, some studies show that personality traits like optimism and pessimism can affect many areas of your health and well-being. The positive thinking that typically comes with optimism is a key part of effective stress management. And effective stress management is associated with many health benefits. If you tend to be pessimistic, don't despair — you can learn positive thinking skills. Here's how. <br />
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Understanding positive thinking and self-talk<br />
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Positive thinking doesn't mean that you keep your head in the sand and ignore life's less pleasant situations. Positive thinking just means that you approach the unpleasantness in a more positive and productive way. You think the best is going to happen, not the worst. <br />
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Positive thinking often starts with self-talk. Self-talk is the endless stream of unspoken thoughts that run through your head every day. These automatic thoughts can be positive or negative. Some of your self-talk comes from logic and reason. Other self-talk may arise from misconceptions that you create because of lack of information. <br />
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If the thoughts that run through your head are mostly negative, your outlook on life is more likely pessimistic. If your thoughts are mostly positive, you're likely an optimist — someone who practices positive thinking. <br />
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The health benefits of positive thinking<br />
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Researchers continue to explore the effects of positive thinking and optimism on health. Health benefits that positive thinking may provide include: <br />
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Increased life span <br />
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Lower rates of depression <br />
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Lower levels of distress <br />
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Greater resistance to the common cold <br />
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Better psychological and physical well-being <br />
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Reduced risk of death from cardiovascular disease <br />
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Better coping skills during hardships and times of stress<br />
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It's unclear why people who engage in positive thinking experience these health benefits. One theory is that having a positive outlook enables you to cope better with stressful situations, which reduces the harmful health effects of stress on your body. It's also thought that positive and optimistic people tend to live healthier lifestyles — they get more physical activity, follow a healthier diet, and don't smoke or drink alcohol in excess.Elaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4040810353064931397.post-31527495711845051372011-07-20T12:38:00.000-07:002011-07-20T12:48:42.580-07:00Entitlement is not positve thinkingSummer has been a very busy time, but I'm still here and at it, are you? I still read and think positive things every day even though I don't take as much time to write.<br />
You should already know what has happened to me. I am happier. Thinking positive and being optimistic are becoming easier for me. I am learning to not let other people determine how I am going to react. I am learning that I am not a bad person when I have to say no and to get rid of those thoughts in my head that try to tell me I am, and ignore the judgemental looks and comments from selfish self serving people that try to make me feel guilty.<br />
There has been alot written lately about this entitlement generation. I know our family has been affected and infected. Here are some samples from Meridian Magazine:<br />
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" The Age of Entitlement actually is an end product of Tom Brokaw’s “Greatest Generation.” Those who lived through the Great Depression, fought their way through World War II, and came home to create families and opportunity, sowed the seeds of the Entitlement Generation. This heroic generation, determined to give the next generation “all the things I never had,” gave them everything in life except the most important: self-reliance. The opportunity met the audience, and the results have reverberated ever since.<br />
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This bespeaks the question: to what are we entitled?<br />
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•Are we entitled to live unsafely and expect a government safety net?<br />
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•Are we entitled to eat poorly, diet poorly, exercise poorly and expect a government program to solve self-inflicted body ailments? Or, even provide low cost medicine and at the same time demand high cost/high yield R&D -- and then retain the right to massive lawsuits for the 10 out of 10 million for whom the medicine doesn’t work – dramatically driving up the cost to the pharmaceutical companies, and ultimately the customer?<br />
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•Are we entitled to live beyond our means our entire adult lives and expect a government guaranteed comfortable retirement income?<br />
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In just one generation we seem to have gone from self-reliance, to entitlement, to victimization. If we don’t get it, we are now victims of someone else’s conspiracy, greed, selfishness, or political ambition. In a comparison of values today vs. 40 years ago, Americans have dramatically increased their demands for someone else to fund and manage their problems.<br />
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Government programs, and those whose lives depend on them, never end. Congressional testimony favors those who want to keep or increase funding for programs over those who present testimony against programs by a 63:1 ratio – and the majority of those testifying are government bureaucrats whose salaries are being paid (including for the time spent testifying) by tax dollars: a clear case of conflict of interest.<br />
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This also goes to the heart of the question of how to define success in government programs. The typical view would be that a program succeeds when it can establish that more people are being served. An alternative view would be that the most successful program would be one where the Administrator would testify that the Congress can now de-fund the program; its purpose had been completely met: there was no one left who needed that service: turn out the lights. It would take a miracle for this to ever happen, but it should be the ultimate goal.<br />
We must take stock now. Once freedom and choice are given away, they are seldom retrieved. As Benjamin Franklin observed: “Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety.”[vi]<br />
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We are entitled to fight to preserve the one, and work to not need the other. That is our entitlement."<br />
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The Age of Entitlement<br />
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<br />
By Larry L. Eastland, Ph. D. <br />
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Editor’s note: Parent polls from a number of sources indicate that the most worried-about parenting challenge of all is the entitlement attitudes of today’s kids. Responding to this concern, the Eyres have undertaken a multi-part series on entitlement which will appear here in the pages of Meridian each Monday.<br />
"Many readers saw and participated in the poll last week about what is the biggest problem or challenge faced by kids (and their parents) in today’s world. <br />
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The results were quite remarkable! More than half of the parents responding were most worried about ENTITLEMENT! (We combined those voting for “entitlement” and those voting with “excessive technology” which, let’s face it, is just another way of saying entitlement—entitlement to all things electronic!) Other audience polls and publication polls have put the percentage of parents most worried about entitlement at more than 65%!<br />
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We have been intrigued and surprised by the size of these majorities, and we have also been pleased, since the title of our new book, being released by Penguin this Fall is The Entitlement Trap.<br />
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Think about it: From half to two thirds of parents, with no explanation or discussion, voted for Entitlement as the biggest problem of this generation of kids and the biggest worry for this generation of parents.<br />
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We ask our audiences why? Their answers are fascinating:<br />
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“Entitlement leads to low motivation.”<br />
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“Kids they deserve everything and don’t have to earn anything.”<br />
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“It makes them disrespectful.”<br />
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“They don’t know how to work.”<br />
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“They think they have to have everything their friends have.”<br />
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“It’s the reason for all the other problems on the list, they think they can do whatever they want.”<br />
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Perhaps the biggest problem with entitlement is that under its illusions, there seem to be no real consequences in life and no motivation to work for anything. Someone will always bail you out, get you off the hook, buy you a new one, make excuses for you, give you another chance, pay your debt, and hand you what you ask for.<br />
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Entitlement is a double edged sword (or a double-jawed trap) for kids. On one edge it gives kids all that they don’t need—indulgence, dullness, conceit, and laziness; and on the backswing, it takes from them everything they do need—initiative, independence, inventiveness, pride, responsibility, and a chance to really work for things and to build their own sense of fulfillment and self-esteem."<br />
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The Biggest Kid-Problem: Entitlement<br />
By Richard and Linda Eyre <br />
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Another Meridian contributor asked readers to respond to a phenomena in our church in her column, <br />
"Using and Abusing the Priesthood Moving Company" By Kathryn H. Kidd, and she was deluged with letters from angry members tired of adults feeling entitled to the free services of members of the church, by virtue of their membership in the church. The article was primarily about moving people (You should read it) but I have seen worse abuse in members asking people to give free service from work that is their livelyhood for free. Some of the respondants adress the isssue of when it is appropriate service, but so many have been abused because of the entitlement attitude of others.<br />
My sister is a floral designer and cake decorator. Either of these tasks are time consuming and expensive. I shudder to think of the disruption in her family and finances if she said yes to all of the requests from friends of friends who ask if she can do the flowers and/or bake the cake because someone wants to have a wedding that they cannot afford.<br />
My husband is a handyman, whose abuse by members caused financial and emotional stress in our early years because my husband thought he should say yes to every request to help build a garage, replace a roof, fix a car, repair the plumbing, etc.. For the sake of my sanity, we are learning to say no. If you say yes, your name gets passed around for greater abuse, " oh call Phil Pence he's good at everything".<br />
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Now how does this all relate to positive thinking?<br />
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Entitlement comes from three things: laziness, selfishness and fear. We fear that we will not have what we want or need unless we can get someone else to do it or get it for us or that we could not possibly live without the help or thing that we want.<br />
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Faith=positive thinking.<br />
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Exercising faith (or thinking positive about our circumstance or problem) we can find an appropriate solution without burdening someone else.<br />
If you don't have the money for the wedding flowers and cake you can have the faith that with creativity and sacrifice you can have a lovely simple reception where what is<u> important</u> is the focus.<br />
If you need something repaired and you can afford a wide screen TV and to eat out once a week, you can pay someone to fix it. Do you have a skill that you can barter that would be beneficial to the other person? If not, don't expect them to do it. If you don't have the money to pay there are resources in books and on the internet that teach you how to do it yourself. It may be difficult, and time consuming but is your time more precious than the person you are asking? And will you not gain from the opposition confidence that you can do hard things. Does or doesn't facing opposition positively make us strong? Is it something you can save your money for and pay someone to do it later? Does it need to be done at all or is it something you want done for convenience or monetary gain? Did you neglect the upkeep and expect someone to bail you out?<br />
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When you think honestly and faithfully about your situation you will find a responsible, unselfish solution. <br />
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let me repeat the Eyre's again:<br />
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"Entitlement is a double edged sword (or a double-jawed trap) ... On one edge it gives (people) all that they don’t need—indulgence, dullness, conceit, and laziness; and on the backswing, it takes from them everything they do need—initiative, independence, inventiveness, pride, responsibility, and a chance to really work for things and to build their own sense of fulfillment and self-esteem."<br />
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That's a very positive way of thinking.Elaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4040810353064931397.post-75829232253140416112011-07-17T18:36:00.000-07:002011-07-17T18:36:13.135-07:00Happiness Is Contagious<iframe height="344" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/vmNVyIr8Puw?fs=1" frameborder="0" width="425" allowfullscreen=""></iframe>Elaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4040810353064931397.post-47758138231120718782011-07-15T19:38:00.000-07:002011-07-15T19:38:21.153-07:00Blessed are the flexibleI read this quote on the wall at the dental school in Richmond many years ago. Being flexible is a positive choice. I don't know the name of the author.<br />
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Blessed are the flexible, for they shall not be bent out of shape.Elaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4040810353064931397.post-18721151317327549802011-07-13T19:43:00.000-07:002011-07-13T19:43:10.632-07:00Inspirational quotes - "Optimist Creed"<iframe height="344" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/2hIIT_wGUqc?fs=1" frameborder="0" width="425" allowfullscreen=""></iframe>Elaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4040810353064931397.post-48244393075322120592011-07-06T14:35:00.000-07:002011-07-06T14:35:42.652-07:00A support group called HappinessA flyer for my positive thinking support group hangs on a bulletin board in the hall at my church, inviting people to come and suggesting some names we might call our group. Someone, not liking the suggestions given, pined this to the board.<br />
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<strong>H</strong>elping<br />
<strong>A</strong>void<br />
<strong>P</strong>romoting<br />
<strong>P</strong>essimism &<br />
<strong>I</strong>nstigating<br />
<strong>N</strong>egativity<br />
<strong>E</strong>very<br />
<strong>S</strong>ingle<br />
<strong>S</strong>ituationElaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4040810353064931397.post-10751397370731350022011-06-27T19:05:00.000-07:002011-06-27T19:05:44.241-07:00Now that's the power of positive thinking!When I was a young mother, having one baby after another, people would ask me "how are you going to pay for their college education? I very matter of factly answered "I'm not." I have to say it took a great deal of positive thinking(faith) to have 8 children in todays world. I believed that God wanted me to have all those children and that, if I did what He wanted me to do, He would provide the miracles, and he did.<br />
Our oldest daughter, Renada, lived at home and went to community college and paid the old fashioned way, working and paying her way. She finally finished her associates degree this year after getting married and having 2 children. She had one unfinished class to take. The next oldest, Taerra, also lived at home to save money and went to VCU her first semester. Then we were inspired to move to the little city of Buena Vista, Va. where a new college had been open catering to the LDS community, Southern Virginia University. Taerra moved with us and transfered and worked her way through 31/2 years at SVU. She received several scholarships that made it affordable.<br />
We opened our icecream parlor here and the whole family worked in it. Bekah had spent her first year out of highschool working for the family for no pay so she didn't have money for school. A wonderful and generous man came into our icecream parlor and met Bekah and inquired about school. When he heard what she was doing, he offered to pay for her education at SVU. He made the same offer to our son Nate the next year. This year Tori, who has been working for her father, for pay, and did not go to college her first year out of highschool, will be paying her own way through SVU aided by living at home and earning scholarships.<br />
It never dawned on me that having a large family would cause a problem with them getting a college education.<br />
Now that's the power of positive thinking!Elaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4040810353064931397.post-6824953663642486212011-06-22T10:47:00.000-07:002011-06-22T10:47:37.526-07:00Just let it goThis one will be easier said than done, sometimes you have to bury your sword.<br />
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I was reflecting on an uncomfortable situation that I find myself in and beginning to let it bug me.<br />
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Once again someone has done one of those things that I really have an issue with. As I was pondering, the story of the converted Lamanites in the Book Of Mormon came to my mind. These people had become a bloodthirsty and wicked people. When they were converted to the truth they knew that they could not wield a sword again because of their “habit” of murder, so they buried their swords. <br />
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I know I need to “bury my sword”, but when it’s not a physical thing I find it hard to know how to <br />
JUST LET IT GO!!Elaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4040810353064931397.post-17516226106981215972011-06-21T19:03:00.000-07:002011-06-21T19:03:54.600-07:00Sometimes you have to bury your swordThink about. I'll tell you my thoughts tomorrow.Elaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4040810353064931397.post-44388192535493364252011-06-15T19:28:00.000-07:002011-06-15T19:28:46.588-07:00Shirley Temple - Be Optimistic - 1938<iframe height="344" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/cPxIajUyiyY?fs=1" frameborder="0" width="425" allowfullscreen=""></iframe>Elaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4040810353064931397.post-18460459611331702722011-06-12T19:57:00.000-07:002011-06-12T19:57:20.280-07:00I have decided not to give upI knew after 90 days I would not necessarily write everyday, but I had a bad experience and I didn’t want to write about , plus it was the first full week of summer vacation. I will just say that I know controlling my thoughts will be a constant lifetime effort and sometimes I will let myself down. I can look back and see progress and I am learning from my mistakes. <br />
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I typed In “Positive thinking” on my church’s website and I read part of an article. I came to this comment that reminded me of what I needed to remember in this case. <br />
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“Letting go of the belief that we can control another person’s behavior does not mean that we cease to care about that person. Instead, it means that we trust that the Lord loves that person and knows better than we do how to help him. Our task then becomes being open to the Spirit’s promptings in our relationships.”<br />
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Jan Underwood Pinborough<br />
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Earlier Michaela was watching a Veggie Tales movie and the message was letting go of your anger. It is hard for me to get rid of negative thoughts and feelings when I feel and think someone has let me down. This has been a common theme in my blogs, but I have decided not to give up, so back in the saddle I go.Elaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4040810353064931397.post-27406823840853058482011-06-06T19:29:00.000-07:002011-06-06T19:29:47.884-07:00A Life Of Positive Thinking And Laughter | Lifescript.com<a href="http://www.lifescript.com/Soul/Self/Well-being/A_Life_Of_Positive_Thinking_And_Laughter.aspx?gclid=CLH_yJ_foqkCFYXd4Aod51lBtg&trans=1&du=1&ef_id=ibtN7YxszFwAAIky%3A20110607022652%3As&sms_ss=blogger&at_xt=4ded8d118a1dc230%2C0">A Life Of Positive Thinking And Laughter Lifescript.com</a>Elaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4040810353064931397.post-14385404326061832252011-06-02T17:48:00.000-07:002011-06-02T17:48:30.395-07:00day 90- think happy, think chocolateA lesson from Michael McLean:<br />
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Close your eyes and count slowly and silently from ONE to TEN.<br />
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Any problems? You don’t have to do this in a foreign language. Your native tongue is fine. Just get from 1 to 10 and open your eyes. <br />
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Great. Now the second part of this little exercise.<br />
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Wait. Before we go to part two, I need to know if you’re familiar with CHOCOLATE. Doesn’t matter which kind of chocolate: Swiss chocolate, dark chocolate, hot chocolate, chocolate ice cream, chocolate cake, chocolate candies, chocolate malted milkshakes. Anything that qualifies as that delicious brown sweet substance that actually forms one of the four major food groups in some people’s diets. If, for dietary reasons you’re unfamiliar with any or all things chocolate, you’re excused from this little test. Okay. We can move on.<br />
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Now, for the second part of this exercise, close your eyes and count slowly and silently from ONE to TEN only DON’T THINK ABOUT CHOCOLATE!!! If anything chocolate enters your mind at any time during your counting you have to stop and start over again, beginning at ONE.<br />
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You might want to think about something that’s NOT chocolate to keep your mind off chocolate, but this can be a tricky strategy because thinking about that OTHER THING simply reminds you that you’re only focusing on it because you’re not supposed to be thinking about the Chocolate this OTHER THING is meant to distract your from thinking about. Just don’t think about Chocolate. Stop it! If you can’t stop it before you start you’re NEVER going to make it from One to Ten without thinking about anything that melts in your mouth, not in your hands….Ignore that. If you have a marker, go ahead and scratch those lines out. Just don’t use a BROWN one. <br />
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Okay, begin.<br />
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Why is this taking you soooooo long? You did this effortlessly in Part 1. What happened?<br />
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The Official M2BJ Handbook would like to suggest what might have happened. In each case the goal was the same; to count from 1 to10. But when the focus was not on the goal, but on what we weren’t supposed to do while trying to reach that goal, everything became more difficult than it needed to be.<br />
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Life can do that to us. Distract us. Become the urgent, demanding, have-to- deal-with-right-now sequence of things that keeps us from CELEBRATING and REJOICING in the little miracles of happiness that are begging for our attention. Remember. Our MISSION is to be “willing to learn” how to celebrate and rejoice the ways we’ve been blessed and find happiness where we haven’t found it before.<br />
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Another thing that probably should be highlighted here before we move on is that bit about learning a new language. The language of JOY.<br />
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Those of us who are not natural linguists may be concerned about the foreign language required for this mission. Some of us aren’t familiar with the language of JOY while others THINK they know what it sounds like, but they’re wrong. <br />
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The language of JOY is not at all the same as what some might call <br />
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“happy-speak”. Happy-Speak is really a pseudo-language like pig-latin. It’s a made up way of communicating where someone can pretend the real tragedies and heart aches of the world can be minimized if they just say the correct happy-speak words to make it all okay. On a mission to be happy the REAL happiness we seek to rejoice and celebrate is not found in glossing over and denying the truths of life with our fingers plugged in our ears as we loudly sing, “la la la la la I’m Not Listening”. No, the language of JOY is nothing if not HONEST, tender and kind. The language of JOY is spoken in truth every single moment, with a faith that just because we don’t really understand why something impossibly difficult has happened to us, (or someone we love) pretending we understand when we don’t is a poor substitute for trusting the source of happiness to reveal the answers when we’re truly ready to receive them. <br />
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The reason it’s ultimately important to learn the language of JOY is not so much for the benefit of others, but for ourselves. If we can learn to think in this language there’s an excellent chance that we’ll be able to place language of joy descriptions in our hearts and minds of the “real deal” when it comes to happiness.Elaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4040810353064931397.post-27759225261158031182011-05-30T19:21:00.000-07:002011-05-30T19:21:32.557-07:00Day 87- cheerfulness, joy, light, and good feelings.Sometimes I just want someone to know I am put out, angry, hurt or whatever. I want to choose to do or say something to let them know. <br />
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Today was one of those days. As I dwelt on it and chose to whine to family about it, I did not feel happy. I remembered this quote from George Q. Cannon:<br />
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“Do not allow darkness and gloom to enter your hearts. I want to give you a rule by which you may know that the spirit you have is the right spirit. The Spirit of God produces cheerfulness, joy, light, and good feelings. Whenever you feel gloomy and despondent and are downcast, unless it be for you sins, ye may know it is not the spirit of God which you have. Fight against it and drive it out of your heart. The spirit of God is a spirit of hope; it is not a spirit of gloom.”<br />
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I may quote this one frequently on my blog because I use it frequently to help me change my thoughts and feelings.Elaine Pencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15009982941248633447noreply@blogger.com1